It's All About the Heart

A couple of days ago I came across this blog. I read a couple of entries. Apparently this blog was gaining popularity fast and had over 6,000 hits a day. The other day, the author of the blog came forward and admitted that it was all fictional. Some people were really angry. I personally thought it was hilarious and was so impressed she pulled it off. But it got me thinking...that's kind of like how life is sometimes. We can paint any kind of picture we want for others to see. And if we're good enough actors, we can pull it off. And some people do. I saw it on a number of occasions growing up.
This brought me to another question...what's the difference between seeing the glass half full (and thus generally being upbeat and happy)and putting up of a front of how we want people to see us? I thought about this a lot the other day. And then I knew the answer. It's what is in our hearts. It's who we are when no one is looking. If we're choosing to give more weight to the good than the bad, then we're going to feel that whether anyone's watching or not. But if we're simply putting on a show in hopes others will see us as something we may not be, then we'll breathe a sigh of relief once the door is shut.

So, just to clear the air...my children are NOT just pretending. They really are perfect. All.The.Time. What?! You don't believe me?! Fine. See for yourself.


This is what my children are doing 24/7 at home. Come on by and see for yourself. (Um, but before you come by, can you just call and give us an hour's notice so I can clean the house...and bathe my boys...and get them looking cute...and bribe/threaten (one of) them to be nice to each other...and do my make up...and get cute clothes on...)
Yea, cause, around here, we're all about what's in the heart.

Family Dinner, What's That?

Tonight was one of those nights where I was deciding between making two different things for dinner. I decided on the spinach/rice casserole.

Izak said he wasn't hungry and wouldn't touch it.
Landon was screaming because his teeth hurt.
Dave doesn't like spinach (who knew?).
So I am left. Eating the spinach casserole all alone.

I should have gone with my first idea.
Sugar cookies.
Something tells me they would've gone over much better.

One Quarter Down (Almost), A Lot More to Go

In two weeks, Dave will complete his first quarter. You know, after working so hard for a common goal for over 5 years, it feels so good to be where we're at. I feel like we've accomplished SO much just to get here. I'm not sure if it's because we worked so hard and had to overcome so much to get to where we are today, but so far, medical school has been good to us. Dave brings home amazing grades every week. We have a system that is working for us. Dave is a great support to me and tries to take care of the kids in the time he has available so that I get time to do stuff for me. I can do this. We can do this. Four years of this is doable. It feels great to know that.
Before we came here we heard a lot of negativity regarding medical school and the effects it has on marriages/families. It's nice to be here, and living it, and to realize that it can be done. Just like anything else, if we really want it, it's going to take work. And working together. It can be done. We will do it. And I'm grateful for the last 5+ years and how much they prepared us for this. Compared to some previous struggles, I welcome this one. This struggle is an exciting one. One where I see Dave accomplishing his dream day by day, week by week. A dream he's had for a long time. It's exciting. And I love to be a part of it. I'm so proud of Dave already.

And here's the man of the hour in all his glory...

13 Down, 13 To Go

So, today I ran my first 1/2 marathon race. I figured pictures would depict how I felt better than I could put into words...
You'll have to excuse the self-portraits, I had to go alone to the race since Dave had another full day of studying.


So naive as to what awaited....


Okay, so it wasn't quite that bad....more like....



Yea. So, it was pretty hard. I'm still not sure how I'm going to manage twice that distance. But, I got my time goal, so I was REALLY excited about that....
Special thanks must go out to the following individuals for helping me achieve my goal today:
The YMCA director who allowed this poor (literally) girl to register and run despite the inability to pay the entrance fee.
My husband who wrestled the boys for 3 hours before handing them off to the next victim.
My friends, Dave and Shelly, for watching the boys until I got back and not kicking me out of their home despite my horrendous stench.
My friend Kathleen who came and cheered for me at the finish line and gave me a great congratulations gift!

On another note, today I discovered the key to keeping your kids from crying. And it only cost me $4 for this amazingly cry-free day with my 3-year-old...


He had already taken his nap by now, so the paint was smeared.

Yep. Anytime Izak would start to cry, I'd remind him that if he cries his paint would smear. Worked like a charm. Everytime. Sad to see the paint go tonight. Until tomorrow. I will be painting his face everyday from now on. The best $4 I ever spent.

And last of all (I promise, this post will end. Maybe.)...the boys and I (Dave not included-in fact, he's still studiously studying as I type this) went to the city halloween party tonight. It was cute to take them. They had lots of fun things... we went trick-or-treating, went to the dragons' petting zoo (they had snakes, cockroaches (which I did NOT touch-too many bad memories from Brazil), bearded dragons, and tarantulas), and a puppet show. It was really cute.



It was a good day. How was yours?

I'm the victim here, I'm the victim

So the other day I had one of those moments with my child, you know, the kind where you wish you could pretend they weren't your own (or is that just me?)...we were walking out of a grocery store and my child (who will remain nameless to keep his pride intact) began to have the biggest melt down ever. Flailing arms, screaming, kicking, biting. You name it. He was all over it. Literally. The only thing I could do was to restrain him (I knew my proper restraint training as a social worker would come in handy sometime!). As people were walking by I was getting the evil eye. I could see the wheels in their minds turning (How dare that mom...that poor little boy....look at his cute little brown eyes, if only he had a chance with a good mom...why i outta...) I mean, look at this kid, could he really be capable of such behaviors?


Don't be fooled by that cute, adorable face you see with those big, brown eyes. Because, truth be told, the shirt says it all...


So, we started a behavior chart for the little monster. He earns stickers for different good behaviors throughout the day. Once he earns enough stickers to get to the star, he earns a prize. I explained the rules of the behavior chart to him. He then clarified by asking, "So, once I get all the way to the star, I get a prize, right?". I told him that was right. So, take a look at where he put the next two stickers...



My little monster is very smart. In fact, whenever I am sick, he always knows how to help me feel better.
Me:Izak, I feel sick.
Izak: Well then, go poop.

It's as simple as that people.

And now you see why I keep my little monster around. And you all thought it was just because he is so cute and charming.

Sometimes Life is Hard

Okay, a few comments before you read this post...I'm posting this really late (sorry it didn't get posted yesterday, I had a volleyball game and didn't get to it after I got home) so if I don't make a whole lot of sense, at least I have an excuse this time! Also, in case any of you are worried, I am not writing this post because things are especially difficult at the moment, something someone said to me the other day triggered this thought and I was interested to hear all of your thoughts on the subject at hand...

Sometimes life is hard. Why does it seem that we are sometimes afraid to admit this? I know I've done it. I WANT to appear as if I've got it all together. I WANT to appear as if I have the most perfect family ever. I want people to see me in this shining light. But the reality is, that sometimes I'm not all put together. Sometimes I'd be embarrassed if someone saw me on my bad days or heard the voice or words I sometimes use when I'm at my worst. Sometimes I don't have the most perfect family ever. Sometimes there is absolutely no light shining around me. Sometimes life is hard.

I recently read on a friend's blog about how she and her husband were celebrating their 3 year anniversary. She commented that it had been a hard 3 years. There were no real details into why it was challenging, just that it was hard. She made sure to state that just because it was hard, doesn't mean that it wasn't worth it or that she doesn't love her spouse. I found her post refreshing. Refreshing to know that sometimes other people struggle just like me. Maybe not in the same way. But that others have struggles too. Because sometimes life is hard.

I think others, like me, sometimes fall into this trap of wanting to appear as if everything is perfect. Why is that? Why is it that we (Disclaimer: By saying "we" I am in no way including YOU personally as I don't know if you do this as well, I am simply saying "we" to include those of us who fall into this category as I am well aware that some of you do not do this, to which I am grateful to learn from your example!) have such a desire to appear as if we've got everything made? Why is it that we are afraid to admit that sometimes things are hard? Is it how we were raised that instills this desire inside us? Is it that we misconstrue what we are taught in our religion to think we are told we have to be perfect now? Is it society that tells us to answer "good" anytime we're asked how we are doing, even if it couldn't be further from the truth? And where is the balance between being a constant complainer to anyone and everyone vs. being a friend that others know they can turn to because we've allowed others to see that we too struggle at times? Because the truth is, sometimes life is hard.

This is something that I've been striving to work on; being more honest with how my life really is. I feel this is important. As I think about the major struggles I have gone through in my life, I can almost always pinpoint one (or a few) person that was significant in supporting me through those trials. Not that anyone could fight my battles for me, or that I was asking them to, but because they were willing to share their struggles with me, which happened to be similar to the ones that I was currently passing through, it gave me a sense of hope that I too could overcome my present challenge just as they had. And how grateful I am to those that have helped me with their support, friendship, encouragement, and love during those times. What a special place they hold in my heart. And how I hope to be that somebody to others. Because I strongly believe that we are placed in one another's lives to help each other at different times. To give hope to others when they no longer can see that hope. And to receive that hope from others when we no longer see it. Because the truth is, sometimes life is hard.

But life becomes a little bit easier when we're willing to share one another's burdens.

All I Want for Christmas Is...

Izak: Mommy, can I have a pony for Christmas?
Me: No, because you know the people that are letting us borrow their house? Well, they said we can't have any animals in their house because it'll get the house all dirty.
Izak: Well, I'll just get a really little pony that can fit in my hand so that way I can hold it all day and it won't get the house dirty.
Me: Izak, even little, little ponies are a lot bigger than you.
Izak: They are?!! Well then, how can they be put in a box and wrapped for Christmas?

Danya and Alex (Dave's twin sister and her husband) were kind enough to come visit us this past weekend. It was a lot of fun. They even took us to the state fair where we had the privilege of dining on the BIGGEST corn dogs I've ever seen, I love corn dogs. It was great....

Danya also made Izak promise that he will ask for a pony every year for Christmas.

Izak always remembers his promises. Yea, thanks Danya.



(This picture was taken after I had already eaten half the corn dog, seriously.)


Fairs are the best...Izak loved the animals (okay, none are in this picture because instead of taking a picture of us in front of some BORING animals, I REALLY wanted a picture in front of the cute little barn display, of course!)

One Talent Wonder

I've been blessed to know some amazing people. I first really started noticing this while serving an LDS mission in Brazil. I served with a lot of amazing women that changed my life forever.
I continue to be astounded by those with whom I come into contact. The more I get to know each one, the more impressed and humbled I am by their many strengths. If I allow myself, I start to feel a twinge of sadness that I am not quite up to par with these ladies, and it makes me stop and wonder how it was decided as to how many strengths and talents we would each be given. Which in turn reminds me of the parable found in Matthew 25:15-28 where it talks about how each person is given a different amount of talents and based on the talents we receive, there are certain requirements attached.
And then I start to not mind so much being one of the ones that may not have as many talents as another, because, just imagine, if I had more talents, would I really have time to blog (Disclaimer: There are many blogs out there that are beneficial and helpful and thus a great use of your/my time, this one just doesn't happen to be one of those) or do the other very important things with which I occupy my time? In fact, all you many talented women (or men, if any actually read this...) out there, do you really think you should be reading this right now? I'm pretty sure you've got some talents to be developing.
So, yea, I think I'm okay with my one talent and I'll just continue to relish in the goodness of the many talented people with whom I am privileged to associate...
So, here's to the One Talent Wonder...



Just try to tell me that face doesn't scream TALENT (Click on picture to see the real talent in action)!

Livin' the Dream

You ask how I am, do you?
All I can say is, I'm livin' the dream.

Don't ask me what the dream is that I'm livin', because I have no clue.
The other day I asked a friend with whom I have not spoken in a couple of years how he was doing, and this was the answer I received. He's living the dream.

What is this dream that people talk of?

Is it waking up at 6am to two onery little boys?
Is it dragging your child out of his friend's house in the midst of a royal tantrum?
Is it getting snot wiped all over your clothes after you've just gotten ready for the day?
Is it asking your child to stop steam rolling your one-year-old for the upteenth time?

If it is, well then, today, I was Livin' the Dream. That's right. Read it and weep.

And here's who I have to thank for the aforementioned Dream Livin'




And I wouldn't change a thing.

(Except maybe the 6am wake up call...and the tantrum throwing...and the snot wiping...and the steam rolling...but those boys, now those boys are keepers!)


How about you, when have you "Lived the Dream"?