The First Incision

Greetings digital blogging world. I have decided to make my first official post. As many of you are well aware I have recently started medical school. So far it is every bit as demanding as I imagined it. At the same time it is very exciting and I love learning about the various subjects that I am studying. Medical school holds a lot of surprises and many unforeseen events. In fact something very interesting happened to me just the other day, I was called into a room to make my very first incision with a scalpel into a human body. It was quite the experience. First I put on my scrubs and gloves.



Then I walked into the room took the scalpel and examined the body. I don't remember what was going on inside of my head at the time, but for those of you who know how I get squeamish at the site of blood you won't be surprised to hear that it was probably something like this "please don't pass out, please don't pass out, please don't pass out". Then I made my first cut into a human body. It was at that point that I realized that cutting open a cadaver really was not as bad as I thought it would be. I think it may have something to do with the training that I receive as an officer in the US army. We are taught to not let these kinds of things bother us. So we continued to open up the back of the body until we found the spine. I have included a picture for those of you who have never dissected a cadaver before.



After we found the spine we were given a bone saw to cut open the spine so that we could expose the spinal cord inside. Once we made our cuts along the spine we were given a hammer and some chisels to complete the job. We had to chisel our way into the bone ( for those of you who like eating crab and lobster you might want to skip this part) and break it apart piece by piece, it was almost like breaking crab legs or lobster claws to expose the meat. We had to break the bones and chisel it so that we could rip pieces of it off to expose the spinal chord.

If there is one thing to be said of medical school it's that it is not dull. There is always something to be done. I really am enjoying it a lot. I also wanted to thank all of you who are supporting my wife during this time by posting on your blogs or calling here on the phone because it lets her socialize with people who are over the age of three, seeing as how I am gone for 12 hours a day and then I come home and study at night. So all of you bloggers I take back everything that I ever said about it, and keep up the good work.

Thought Full Thursday

So the other day I was reading an article that was talking about legacies. It asked what type of legacy we will leave our children, whether it be the children we now have or the ones we will one day have. It made me stop and ponder on what legacies I want to leave my children. I wrote down in my journal the legacies I hope to leave my children and how I will achieve this. The legacies I wish to leave my children are simple:

1. I want them to know that they are loved.
2. I want them to know that they are special.
3. I want them to know there is a Father in Heaven that loves them and a Savior that suffered and died for any mistakes they will ever make or any hardships through which they will pass.
4. I want them to know that the gospel of Jesus Christ will bring them more happiness and peace than anything else ever could.

If I leave these legacies for my children, I will have succeeded as a parent. And if I leave these legacies for my children, how much better prepared will they be to go out and face the world than was I. It took me a long time to realize that I am loved. That I am special. And how vitally significant this knowledge is. It shapes my decisions every day of my life. I wonder what decisions I might have made differently had I known this years before (I am a slow learner). But how grateful I am to have this knowledge now. And how I hope to help my children have this knowledge at a much younger age than I so they can accomplish whatever they dream of accomplishing.

How about you...what legacies do you hope to leave your children (whether present or future)? What knowledge do you now have that you wished you had at an earlier stage in life?

Thought Full Thursdays

So, I was thinking that I'm going to start a new kind of post every week. On Thursdays I will post some of my random, disorganized thoughts. I know you may be wondering if I really have enough deep thoughts to post every week. I am too. I guess we'll see. But here is today's day full of thought (I would love any additional insight or thoughts you may have as well)......
As some of you may know, this last year has been a rough year. I'd venture to say, the hardest year of my life up until this point. But it has been such a good year in so many ways. I have learned and been reminded of things that I hope I will never forget again.
One of the most important things that I was reminded of through the course of this last year is the power each of us has to be the deciders of our own destinies. It is incredibly empowering to know that we choose who we will become. We decide if we will be happy. This in no way means we will always be happy. This means that when we are not happy, we have the power to make decisions to change our situation. I learned this a long time ago. I remember coming to a point in my life when I realized that I had been victim to different circumstances. I was wronged. I was angry. And I had every right to be angry. And then I realized that I had the power to choose whether I would continue to be a victim to the injustices dealt to me or if I would choose to allow those wrongs to mold me into an even better person than I was before I was victimized. That realization was incredibly empowering.
When life wasn't going my way last year, I forgot this incredibly important piece of information. I felt depressed at the thought that I was yet again a victim and there was nothing that I could do about it. Being a victim is hard. Feeling powerless is even harder, it's incredibly depressing. And then I remembered. I remembered that I was the one with the power to change what I did not like. That no one had enough power over me to take that away from me. And I felt a sense of hope and newness once again. I took action. Action is so empowering. And I felt myself come to life again.
Sometimes it's incredibly hard to have to acknowledge that no matter our circumstance, we ALWAYS have a choice. Once we admit to ourselves we have a choice, we can no longer blame anyone else for our circumstances because we then realize that we have the opportunity to better our situation. And sometimes it's easier to continue to be the victim than to make that hard choice. But that choice is the most empowering experience and realization. And it fills my life with hope. Knowing that no matter what may come in my life, I can ALWAYS choose to do something about it. To better my life. To create my own happiness.
And I will do this.
And, for the record, I never imagined how happy I would be today in comparison to how I felt a year ago. My life is in no way perfect, but I never thought that my life would be where it is today. I wouldn't trade this last year for anything. Action is empowering.

And So It Begins

So, I've decided to put into action my goal to "one day" run a marathon. I'm now training to run a marathon on Jan. 3rd just outside of Las Vegas (so Jenny and Betsy, I sure do hope to see you guys while I'm there!!). In any case, I've only been training for a couple of weeks now, but so far, so good.
Or as good as it can be considering I have to train the whole time while pushing both Izak and Landon. And let me tell you, more than the physical pushing of the two is the constant mediating between them. But, the other day, I had a non-mediation run with the boys and I swear I ran 5 minutes/mile faster!

Let me give you a little glimpse into how it is running with Izak and Landon....

Pant, Pant, "Izak, keep good space", Pant, Pant, "Izak, you need to keep good space", Pant, Pant, "Izak if you keep good space we can go swimming (or to the park or watch a movie or get a cookie....) when we get home", Pant, Pant, "Izak, remember you're trying to earn your reward", Pant, Pant, "Izak, if you don't stop pushing (or touching or smashing or hitting) Landon you're going to have to have a time out when we get home", Pant, Pant, "Izak, stop touching Landon right now" (In not the most pleasant voice ever).

Times that by 100 and you've got the idea. Seriously. But we've got to do something while Dave is at school for 12 hours a day, right?